In a surprising twist straight out of a Wild West showdown, Yosemite Sam, the ornery and trigger-happy cowboy, has declared that he won’t be saddling up for any bank heists in the city that never sleeps – New York. The reason? A hefty fine slapped on former Donald Trump for a crime that, according to Sam, is as elusive as a tumbleweed on a windy day.
The ruling against Trump, demanding a jaw-dropping $355 million in penalties plus interest, has left Yosemite Sam shaking his head in disbelief. If Trump were to cough up the entire amount today, it would be like handing over a bag of gold nuggets worth roughly $450 million.
In a missive posted on the digital frontier known as X (formerly Twitter), Sam, who’s not known for mincing words, declared, “Dear varmints, I mean, citizens, let it be known that Yosemite Sam ain’t fixin’ to be part of no bank heists in the Big Apple. Them highfalutin penalties against Trump have riled me up, and I reckon it’s time to steer clear of that there city. Instead, we’ll be focusin’ on rustlin’ up opportunities in states where the winds of justice don’t blow so darn hard. Texas and Florida, here we come!”
The decision has left many scratching their heads, wondering if Yosemite Sam’s gold fever has been replaced by a newfound sense of law-abiding virtue. Some speculate that Sam might be afraid of crossing paths with those pesky lawmen or, worse yet, encountering a certain wabbit with a penchant for foiling plans.
Trump supporters, on the other hand, are rallying behind Yosemite Sam, hailing him as the rootin’-tootin’ hero who won’t let the law rain on their parade. Whether Sam’s decision will lead to a new era of Wild West wisdom in real estate remains to be seen. One thing’s for sure – this is one showdown that even the tumbleweeds are watching with bated breath.